Hello, helpmepayformywedding readers!
Thankyouthankyouthankyou for your donations, comments, angry emails, happy emails… This experiment is causing so much unexpected hoopla and I’m loving it. Keep it coming!
To address some of the questions I’ve been getting – in the words of Usher… these are my confessions:
1. I have almost no money saved for my wedding. Or house, for that matter. Need both, but concentrating on the wedding here – FOCUS. Why do I have nothing saved? Well, because the proposal was a surprise for one thing. For another, I’ve spent the past year paying off all my debt – an accomplishment I’m quite proud of, thankyouverymuch. From what was that debt, you ask? Miscellaneous. Important things like student loans, and frivolous things like fabulous shoes and highlighting my hair. I admit it. I spent like a maniac on things I shouldn’t have. Which is why my hair is now my natural color and I’m in last season’s jeans. The itch to spend is coming back in a big way with these wedding plans, and that is why I’m planning ahead of time to stay OUT of debt. Hence, helpmepayformywedding. If you want. 🙂
2. We have not set a date yet.
3. I’m not a spoiled brat. If I were, Mommy and Daddy would be forking over the cash for my wedding. Since they’re not, I’m getting creative.
4. This is not a charity. It’s a fun little experiment that I’m shocked and thrilled is working. (Thankyouthankyouthankyou!) Helping out a sister is good karma. Clearly, I am aware that there are people out there with more urgent needs than my desire to throw an endlessly breathtaking wedding extravaganza. And if you’re grappling with the decision of donating a dollar to helpmepayformywedding or donating a dollar to a real charity for the needy, the choice is obvious. My guess is that the haters out there are donating to neither.
5. I had no idea what the 4 C’s of diamonds were until my fiance told me about my ring.
6. Yes, I’ve already chosen my bridesmaids and no, I will not be forcing them to buy overpriced gowns.
7. I’m not lazy. I work like everyone else and am saving my money, too. I don’t expect you to pay for my wedding, I’m just asking for help if you feel like giving it. If not, that’s fine, too.
8. I’ve already had over 1,000 visits to this blog and it’s been live for about 24 hours.
9. No, my fiance does not know I’ve started this website, but I’m thinking he’d find it to be pretty genius. I’m going to surprise him once I’m able to cover our wedding without going into debt.
10. Do I know that asking for money is a bit “tacky” as so many of have called it…. yes. But, desperate times call for desperate measures. And it’s not as if I’ll announce to my guests that I solicited donations to pay for their bacon wrapped scallops. Give me some credit, people.
Well, readers. I’m signing off for the evening but look forward to hearing from you. And to all those kind folks who donated – thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!
Help Me Pay For My Wedding! 
18 comments
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March 31, 2009 at 3:11 am
Amira
You’re bluffing. No one is donating to your stupid charity.
What’s up with your comments? Why aren’t you posting the positive ones.
Liar.
March 31, 2009 at 3:13 am
Amira
Oh and by the way, the IRS has been informed. I hope they taxed the hell out of your ass.
March 31, 2009 at 2:06 pm
Bride Paying for my own wedding
If other people have let you know that asking for money is ‘bit’ tacky… they were being extremely polite. Who do you think you are? You’re not special and if you didn’t save your money for wedding, then have a wedding you can afford. There is nothing wrong is having a small, simple ceremony and get-together with friends and family afterwards. You are not entitled to a fancy wedding reception with all the bells and whistles. The people who get those types of weddings – are the people who have the money to pay for them. And, 90% of the time, they personally worked for that money. The other 10% may be lucky enough to be given money for the wedding – but they did not solicit strangers on the internet for the money.
Get over yourself… grow up, and lean to live within your means. I also recently paid of some debt, but I didn’t start a blog to congratulate myself, and then ask people to pay for our next home because I spent all my money elsewhere! You really don’t sound mature enough to be getting married – and I do think you should share this site with your fiance. He really deserves to know who he is marrying and what he is getting himself into now, while he still has time to run away!
March 31, 2009 at 3:53 pm
person
You are disgusting.
March 31, 2009 at 7:22 pm
southrnsuga
I think you are a genius and I hope this works really well for you. The Martha Stewart Wedding Blog just posted your story on their home page! Hence, how I found you. I hope you bring in a killing.
If you are invited to talk shows to interview about the blog, GO!
Money is out there, but sometimes it is just about finding the right people to give…hope you have a stellar wedding…
Just an afterthought, you should submit your wedding to StyleMePretty after everything and tell them your story. It would be classic!
March 31, 2009 at 9:02 pm
Tova Darling
My first reaction when I saw this wasn’t particularly positive. And then I thought about it some more, and frankly… if people want to help you pay for your wedding, who am I to judge?
My parents (without my knowledge) started saving up for my wedding my freshman year of college, so by the time I got engaged, there was already a hefty wedding account with my name on it. I (much like you) had always wanted a gorgeous wedding, and thanks to my parents, I got one. If my parents hadn’t decided to start saving before I even met Prince Charming, who knows what I would’ve done to pay for my wedding. Good luck! I hope that your wedding is beautiful! Please keep us posted on how much you raise.
March 31, 2009 at 9:13 pm
Um…No « Practically Married
[…] too am paying down my student loans, which is one of the major reasons we’re being as conservative with our wedding budget as we […]
March 31, 2009 at 10:20 pm
Jerry C.
This blog is…for real? Yikes.
1) You say that you’re not a spoiled girl, that your parents are giving you the money for your wedding. Yet you’re completely fine with asking perfect strangers for a handout? A handout because, by your admission, you WANT an extravagant wedding. That’s not spoiled, how?
2) “Fun little experiment.” Good lord.
3) No money for house or wedding, but the wedding should be the focus! Nice one.
4) If the “haters” out there aren’t donating to anything, that’s still a lot better than donating to this little “experiment.” At least there might be the chance that their money will go to something useful in the future. And no, “your happiness” does not qualify as useful.
5) Note: haters should be labeled to people who are down on perfectly reasonable things. This is not a perfectly reasonable thing, it’s asking for charity for a completely ridiculous and unnecessary event.
6) If you really think your fiance would think that this is genius, why not tell him? My guess: if you do manage to amass enough to cover your wedding from donations and told him, he’d be mortified that you had to basically be a beggar who preyed on the kindness of complete strangers for, again, A COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY EVENT. same reason you’re not telling your guests, am i right? What’s there to be embarrassed about, it’s just a fun little experiment!
7) I think good karma would be someone finding out your true identity and wedding details and informing your guests on the big day. =)
April 1, 2009 at 12:48 am
D
Fabulous idea! Ignore the negative feedback and focus on the positive.
April 2, 2009 at 5:11 pm
ev
I think your idea is awesome. Yes it isn’t conventional, but I do find it highly entertaining and I hope it works. Good Luck. 🙂
April 6, 2009 at 3:21 pm
Alysia
I think this is a creative way to pay for a budget. I think you should sit down with your fiance and talk about a date, then create a budget. At least get an idea when you want to get married. By having a date in mind, you can work towards that goal. You can get married with 5,000 dollars and still have a fabulous event. You just have to do DIY and be willing to do some extra work.
May 4, 2009 at 8:21 pm
Sarah
If you are going to be offended and upset people write rude comments on your blog, do NOT offend other people. In regards to your #3, just because someone has their parents paying for their wedding does not make them a spoiled brat. My parents are paying for my wedding because they want to and are able to. This does NOT make me a spoiled brat. It is because I am FORTUNATE enough to have my parents be able to and want to pay for my wedding. I do not take it for granted and find it very insulting you would insinuate that people who have their parents pay for their wedding are spoiled brats.
May 4, 2009 at 8:35 pm
broke bride-to-be
Howdy Sarah,
Thanks for your comment. I apologize if you are offended by my #3 and think I insinuated that peeps whose parents pay for their weddings are brats. I can see how it would read that way, but that is not my P.O.V. at all – in fact, I hope to be able to pay for my kids’ weddings someday. I don’t think you’re spoiled because your parents are paying for your wedding – I think you’re lucky. It was just an example to prove that I’m not spoiled because if I were, then I probably wouldn’t be running a blog to accept internet donations for my wedding. BTW, I’m not really offended by any of the rude comments. I don’t really let those types of things get to me. 🙂 I just don’t really want to publish profanities.
Hope this clarifies!
xo BB2B
November 15, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Sam
Dear Sarah,
Get over yourself. Don’t you have anything better to do than to slam someone’s brilliant idea to help pay for a wedding?
You’re no better; you allowed someone else to pay for your wedding completely, and at least she is still paying for her wedding partially by working for it. What does it matter then, where the money comes from? Very “pot and kettle”. Jealousy is a bad color on everyone, but for the sake of this conversation, it also makes your ass look fat 😉
Oh, and just for the record, you ARE a spoiled brat. I can tell by your audacious demeanor that you assume you can get your way by having a bad attitude and throwing a fit.
Newsflash! No one cares about your tantrum, sweetheart.
September 29, 2010 at 12:04 pm
4Armymoms
God, has bleassed me with one daughter so I am finding ways to help my daughter pay for her wedding. My husband is a Muslim and does not believed our daughter should have an American wedding. I am selling some of the jewelry his family gave me, but my daughter will not ask anyone for a handout. I will cut back on my grocery bills each week, until I can pay something for towards her wedding. I will do whatever it takes to give my daughter what she wishes, and asking for money is wrong to do. I was married at the courthouse at age 16, and I just celebrated my 25th wedding anniversary with my current and only husband. You should learn to find ways to pay for your wedding or do what I did. Lol
November 15, 2010 at 5:51 pm
Sam
Good for you! This is awesome. Stick with it!
I hope you have an incredible wedding day!
You should post pics of your wedding on this site after it’s all finished.
November 15, 2010 at 8:07 pm
Broke Bride-to-Be
Sam,
Thanks for your comment 🙂 I thought the idea was pretty brillz myself. Sarah does have something up her ass, no? 🙂
BTW, we’re married now and currently on our honeymoon! xo
December 29, 2010 at 12:09 am
Jacquie
If you have any extra funds and are willing to send my way I’m a broke bride-to-be as well! Congrats on your wedding! 🙂